Tag Archives: resumes

In Which Sarah Reveals the Extent of Her Nincompoopery

2 Jun

EDIT: I finally succeeded! Read no further if you’re here to get some useful information for your job hunt.  Here’s an article that details 5 classic resume mistakes that recent grads make. So don’t do them, or your puppy will combust.  Or worse.  If you want to read about how much I fail as a serious blogger, please continue.

Since Ryan isn’t here to ensure I behave myself, the integrity of this blog has near perished.**  He is a much smarter and bloggier type person than I am, and frankly, I don’t know how he manages to be this responsible.  His posts are all, “Look, I’m being journalistic and intelligent,” whereas mine are “adurrp buhh FEELINGS AND JUNK FOOD AND CARTOONS lulz.”

In an effort to imitate Ryan’s writing style and maintain whatever weird balance we’ve created, I tried to find some thoughtful articles of my own to discuss.  I figured that he probably gets these things from Google, because that’s where we get everything–we’ll probably start getting our food and babies from Google soon too (it’s the mightiest verbed noun on the planet).

You ARE so adjective, oddly shaped scribble man!

Here’s what I Googled in my quest for credibility. (See? I verbed it.)

  • getting a job is hard
  • hooters leads you to successful careers?
  • zombie jobs
  • i want to marry the internet

Needless to say–but I’ll say it anyway–it’s going to be a damn interesting few weeks.

**Sure, you may not have noticed yet, but it’s slipping.  I have machinations of drawing pictures of robots and manta rays in lieu of real posts, even though I have a list of newsworthy and relevant topics (but no articles!), some even in draft form.  But you’ll be saved from my incompetency soon enough; guest posters are coming, huzzah!

These resumes are much prettier than yours

11 May

You probably spent hours perfecting your resume, trying to determine if the words “spearheaded” or “initiated” better described your indescribable awesomeness.  Well, be prepared to be shamed by your depressing lack of creativity.  If you’ve got time to kill, here’s an impressive collection of artistic and creative resumes.  Kinda makes you want to do yours over, right?

Some of my favorites are below: